Push For My Heart: Chapter Three

 

Maruki and Aiya headed on their way home, the same homes they have lived in for many years past. Like everyday after school, they always walked each other home. Aiya’s home was first, which was good for Maruki, he could always make sure that Aiya got home safely. The large green field lay ahead of the school soccer field, both boys made quiet synchronized steps over the soft green grass. Each bundle of green blades made a soft crunch with each step they took.

The walk was silent, for neither Aiya nor Maruki wished not to say anymore, in fear the other would get mad. Both knew that they wished to say more about Miyuki, but now was not the time. They had come up to Aiya’s small one floor home and stopped at the gates.

“See you tomorrow?” After a small hesitation, and an awkward stare, Maruki slipped a hand into his pants pocket. His eyes soon fell to the ground in feeling the awkwardness grow.

Aiya smiled and kneeled down slightly, to be right in Maruki’s face, looking up at him, his dark eyes were happy again.

“Be prepared, you know what will happen again tomorrow Maa chan” Aiya joked, hoping to see a smile again

Maruki sighed softly and playfully slapped Aiya’s shoulder lightly. Being teased like that, in a time like this did not add up well for Maruki.

“Just go inside Aidou” Maruki winked happily and headed off home again, waving cutely to his friend.

On his way home, only a few meters away from Aiya’s gate, Maruki spotted something in the corner of his eye, making him second glance this scene. Sitting across the street from Aiya’s house, on a bus bench was a girl. With the first glance, Maruki recognized who it was, making him stop in his tracks.

Looking in both directions before darting across the residential street, he stopped off to the side of the girl.

Bright bulb eyes stared blankly ahead. With a single blink, the girl looked up at Maruki sweetly. A small smirk played on the girls glossed lips.

“Good evening Kaore kun” sly remarks from a mysterious girl. With her hands folded neatly across her lap, she was definitely up to something.

Maruki would not give this girl another chance, even if his life counted on it. His round coffee coloured eyes narrowed darkly, sending a hateful glare in her direction.
“What are you doing here Miyuki?” when talking to Miyuki in private, Maruki was nothing but cold and stern to her, as well as most of the other classmates. Hatred laced this boy’s heart when it came to this girl, hurting one that is like his family is unforgiveable.

Miyuki danced around the question, dancing was what she did best, ignoring a subject long enough to get what she wanted. Miyuki giggled like a little schoolgirl, tilting her head in a playful manner.

“I was going to ask you the same thing Maruki” with using the same cold tone as Maruki, Miyuki stood trying to intimidate the young boy. “Always walking Aiya chan home, keeping a close eye on him, inappropriate physical contact in school hallways” this girl was getting on Maruki’s nerves, and it was showing greatly.

“I always knew that boy was gay. I knew it from the start”

That made Maruki’s blood boil, his urge to strike the girl was almost difficult to contain. Maruki knew Aiya his whole life, him being like that would never happen.

“Look Miyuki, you don’t know Aiya at all. You have no right to judge him like that.” Without saying any harsh comments that could possibly get him in trouble, a simple comeback was all Maruki could come up with. Even without the girl saying anything, her disgusting smirk was enough for him to continue.

“Just because Ai finds and abominable twat like you attractive, who is obviously too full of themselves and already thinks they are attractive.” Maruki was on his way to getting himself in trouble, but he needed to vent. “You aren’t even attractive Miyuki. Caked on make up, infected piercings, and surrounding yourself with ugly minions gets you nowhere in life.”

Miyuki couldn’t believe her ears, Maruki was being entirely rude, but with what she had done in the past, he had a right to be as rude as he was. Miyuki stumbled back a few steps, stunned and speechless. She stood dumbstruck for a few moments, Miyuki was ready with an insulting comeback.

“So you are his lover?” The evil grin returned to the girl’s sly lips. She was not about to lose this fight, “that also doesn’t surprise me” Cocky and Immature, Miyuki was not playing fair.

A comment that hurt a little, not only to think of his friend as a homosexual, but him as well. Aiya, like the brother he felt like, could hardly be considered a lover. Though upon hearing it, it almost sounded right. To consider Aiya a lover, even though neither were like that seemed to be more of a successful method of keeping Aiya safe. Maruki had much more to say to this cruel hearted girl, but he walked. He walked without saying another word to her.

Sure walking away made Maruki lose this battle, and he hated losing. His future plans would help him with the war, one battle was nothing when lost. The distant cackle could be heard as he crossed the road, ignoring it as best he could, Maruki kept walking silently.

Finally reaching his door, Maruki paused, he didn’t want to go in for reasons unknown. Ever since his mother got a better job and his father got a promotion, they have been very sophisticated and full of themselves. Now, living a first class family life, Maruki didn’t feel like a first class family child. Though, everything he wanted was given to him, he was free to do what he wanted, but he didn’t feel free. Turning the handle of the door, Maruki stepped into his home his slippers neatly waiting for him at the door. The smell of tea and Vanilla Orchid filled his nostrils, making him wrinkle his nose slightly.

Saeko came to the door from the kitchen, moving the short paper curtains from her peripheral view.
“Ne, welcome home Maruki. How was school?” Saeko was a polite and beautiful woman now that she got out of her old line of work. Her cheerful tone was like that of a typical mother.

Maruki placed his shoes to the side, sliding his feet into his slippers. With no eye contact, Maruki gave a simple response as he rudely walked passed his mother, almost pushing her out of the way.

“Good” Maruki was still upset about Miyuki, he was even being cold to his mother. He started up the stairs, stopping on the third step when his mother called up to him.

“Did something happen Maruki? Do you want to talk about it?” A mother’s intuition, she knew something was wrong the instant she saw his face. If he did not want to talk about it, she would not force him.

Maruki paused a moment, hesitant of his actions. He turned and smiled brightly to his mother, hoping to cover up his feelings.
Nothing Kaa chan, I’ll be in my room. No need to call me for dinner, I’ll eat when I am hungry” Maruki giggled as he would on a regular basis, and ran up the stairs to his room.

Saeko knew that Maruki was covering up his feeling, something all teenagers did from their parents. Her older child did it all the time. Now her daughter was moved out, living in an apartment with two of her friends near her work in the city.

Maruki threw himself down on his bed, which changed for the better since his primary days. A queen sized sophisticated bed for a hard working middle school student. Not moments after he had relaxed on his bed in a comfortable position, his phone rang. He was not old enough for a cell phone, but his parents gave him one anyways.

Maruki let it ring a few times before he slugged himself up to his knees, where he crawled off the bed to the desk. Only one person ever called him only one person was in his contacts, Aiya.

“Aidou, what’s up?” Maruki was calm and cool in answering the phone. He was upset himself, but he didn’t wish to make Aiya upset.

Aiya chuckled slightly as to how Maruki answered the phone, it was cute and thoughtful, yet somehow upsetting.

“Stop calling me that Maruki. Really, you don’t have to” Aiya was sweet when he spoke to Maruki, his feet kicking the air as he looked at his school uniform hanging on the door.

Maruki smiled even though no one was around to see.

“I like calling you it though” There was a long pause between the both of them, Maruki found himself looking around the room blankly. “Do you remember how you got that name Aiya?” Maruki’s vivid memory played back that scene in his head suddenly. A memory that was small, yet very significant to Aiya. When they were both entering first year elementary school, Aiya had found a lost stray puppy, knowing he couldn’t take it home, him and Maruki kept it in an alleyway near a park. One day after returning to feed it, months after finding it and taking care of it. Maruki and Aiya had found the almost fully-grown puppy dead. It was attacked by a wild animal in the night, not having finished its food from the day before, the animal was attracted to the smell and came to take it. The still very small tried to fight it off, but lost.

Maruki and Aiya were attached to the animal, they even gave it a name. Every time Aiya would feed the animal, and when he placed the container down, the pup would bark in thanks. Each time, Aiya would say ‘Douita’. With the love the two young boys they decided to nickname it ‘Ai’ for Aiya found it, and ‘Dou’ from what he would say to it everyday. ‘Aidou’ was also an acronym for ‘Idol’. Even though Aidou passed away, he would always be with Aiya.

Aiya smiled as well, staring at his door. He was dressed in his nightwear now, knowing he wouldn’t be going anywhere anytime soon.

“All right Maa chan.” Aiya’s voice was low, like a whisper. His mother was walking outside the door and he didn’t want her knowing that he was talking on the phone.
“So, I called for a reason Maa chan”

At that moment Maruki’s heart leapt into his throat. In the back of his mind, he was hoping that Aiya was not going to say what he was thinking.

“Why is that Aiya?” Maruki was a little worried now, hoping that Miyuki did not go to Aiya’s home after he left.

Aiya was slightly excited about his news he almost couldn’t speak. Soft ruffles could be heard on the phone, Aiya rolled over onto his back and sprawled out on his unmade bed.

“Miyuki asked me out on a date” with a little excitement in his voice, he finally spilled his news.

Maruki slapped his hand down on the surface of the desk hard. A loud clap echoed through his room. Though he was shocked, Maruki was not quite stolen of his words yet.
“What?” An even louder echo bellowed though his clean room, Maruki knew Miyuki was up to no good.

Aiya chuckled, a hand running through his back hair.

“I know! That’s what I said.” With sounding almost as shocked at Maruki was, he thought that Aiya was on his side. “a girl never asks a boy out, right?” Aiya was adorable and happy, but very naïve.

Maruki stood straight, hand pressed firmly on to the wood surface of his desk. “Aiya you cant go out with her!” For a first day back at school, this was already too much drama. Every school had some drama, but not this much this fast.

“She is going to ruin you Aiya, cant you see that?” Maruki felt his heart in his throat, throbbing painfully. He was holding back from screaming in worry, sadness and even anger towards Aiya.

Aiya sat up in his bed, crossed legged and innocent. He could easily see that Maruki did not want him seeing her. Was Maruki thinking that a girlfriend could take him away from this friendship? Was he jealous of him finally having the possibility of having a girlfriend?

“Maruki, stop. You don’t have to watch out for me every moment of my life.” For once Aiya spoke in a stern tone. Though he felt a tight knot in his throat, he kept a level head.

“I like Miyuki still. She asked me out, and I am going to try for this chance. It doesn’t come often you know?”

Maruki knew this all too well. Him and Aiya have been the same their entire lives. Intellectual, Athletic, yet quiet. They did not like to talk to anyone but each other.

“Aidou, I do know.” His voice was weak. Sadness of the past pains were flooding back all at once.

“I just want you to be careful, you are like a brother to me.” Knowing that Aiya was not going to listen almost hurt. Maruki knew the feelings he held for Miyuki, and he knew he couldn’t change them, they would have to be changed on their own. Maruki closed his eyes slowly, taking in a slow quiet breath, what was this knot he was feeling? Jealousy?

Letting out a small sigh, Aiya flopped back down on his bed. Pulling the mismatched blankets over himself lazily, he rolled onto his side.

“I’ll be fine Maruki, okay?” Aiya’s tone had seemed to die down a little, but he was still frustrated at Maruki’s attitude towards the situation.

“Please Maruki, let me do something alone for once.”

Maruki couldn’t help this situation, it was going to be inevitable for him.

“Okay Aiya, do what you want.” Maruki was angry out of hurt. A position where people usually said things they would regret, only to hurt others who had hurt them.

“But if she hurts you don’t come running to me.” It was a rather difficult sentence to allow pass over his tongue, having never said anything negative to Aiya before. Maruki had never even said ‘no’ to Aiya before.

Maruki fell silent for a moment, small chopped breaths could be heard in the receiver, he was trying to hold back tears. Aiya thought long and hard about his response, he was going to be as mature about this and level headed as possible.

“Thank you Maruki. I’m sure I’ll be fine alone anyways. I mean, how difficult can a girl be, right?” A small nervous laugh left Aiya’s lips.

Aiya fell silent for a moment as well, thinking about a different subject to talk about so they both could forget about it and talk normally again.

“So, first year Middle School. Are you excited Maru-chan?’ Aiya was happy and cheerful, trying to cheer up Maruki.

It wasn’t difficult to ignore Aiya’s attempt to cheer him up. Maruki let out a small happy chuckle and, his eyes lit up once again.

“I think I’m ready for whatever Middle School throws at me. Don’t you Aidou?” Maruki pushed aside all of his feelings of Aiya wanting to Date Miyuki.

“Are you excited to be back?” Maruki asked sweetly in return, stepping away from his desk, lying back down on his bed. Maruki placed his phone on his pillow, having Aiya on speakerphone.

Aiya took a small breath, about to respond, but a small crash coming from the kitchen cut him off, followed by shouts and screams.

“Kuso. Maru-chan, I have to go, ne?” His mother was drunk again and getting angry at something again.  Aiya would have hung up right away, but he wanted to hear Maruki say good-bye to him.

Maruki made a small noise, hoping Aiya would be all right.

“Okay, good night Aiya. See you tomorrow.” Maruki hung up first, filled with worry. He sprawled out on his bed, face buried in his soft pillow.  The last time Aiya was at home in a situation like this, his mother hit him repeatedly, leaving bruises on his face and neck. Maruki propped his head up, checking the time on his alarm clock it was still early. Early or not, Maruki was tired and decided to take a nap. He got up and stripped off his uniform, tossing it on his dresser.

Being only in his boxers, Maruki crawled under his down filled blanket and curled up in a ball, facing his cell phone just in case Aiya was to call again.

It didn’t take long for Maruki to fall asleep. Lying face down on his soft bed, stressed about Aiya, the strange peers at school, first day back at school, it was all too much to take in.

Dreaming of nonsenses, Maruki was tossing and turning. The ringing of his phone was coinciding with his dreams, than it stopped momentarily. After a few moments, the ringing commenced again. Groaning, Maruki blinked slowly before jolting awake. Stammering for his phone he finally found it on the last ring before the voicemail would answer it.

“Ai-Aiya?” Maruki accidentally shouted into the phone without even realizing it. Maruki was surprised to hear sobbing from the other end of the line.
“Aiya are you all right?”

Aiya couldn’t stop himself from sobbing uncontrollably. Maruki knew right away that something happened again. Aiya sniffed softly, him wiping his nose could be heard over the phone.
“Maruki.” Aiya managed to whimper softly. He sounded like he was in great pain, his voice was slurred and muffled.

“She hurt me again.” A small wince followed his pained sentence.

Rather then getting a few small hits like the last time, he was beaten greatly in the face and arms. Looking much like his father but nothing like his mother, he mustn’t have been his mother’s son at all. Aiya had held his arm up in self-defense from his mother. She had twisted it when he had tried to run away from her. He was now afraid that it could have been broken.

Now hiding in the pantry with the phone, Aiya was terrified, his mother never hit him like that before. Instead of calling the police, where he wouldn’t feel safe talking, Aiya called Maruki, the only person he could be open with. For now Aiya didn’t need Maruki to say anything, just knowing he was there was good enough for him.

Almost a half an hour of listening to Aiya sobbing and sniffling, finally regaining a steady breath, he finally spoke.

“I… I think its safe. I think she’s asleep Maru-chan.” Still with nothing but a muffled whimper, Aiya couldn’t say much more without hurting himself.

Maruki sat up, pulling his blankets to cover his lap, his small slightly chubby torso exposed in the dark.

“Are you going to be okay Ai?” Maruki’s voice was filled with concern. He didn’t want anything to happen to his friend when there was nothing he could do to help.

Maruki’s breath matched Aiya’s as he left the pantry slowly.

Be careful Ai.” Maruki whispered softly in order for it not to echo on Aiya’s end.

The house was bright, every light was on and the small house was messy and wet from spilled cups of water that was on the counters.  Aiya tip-toed through the kitchenette to the living room, through the open paper screen door. his mother was sleeping on the floor next to the dojo table, passed out with an empty bottle in her drunken hand. It was safe to say that Aiya was going to be fine for the rest of the night.

Aiya let out a soft sigh and relaxed a little. He went to go straighten his arm when he remembered it had hurt, a small winced passed his lips. He took a small breath and whispered softly in order not to wake his mother.
“I’m okay now Maru-chan. I’m just going to go back to bed, all right?” With pain still laced in his whimpers, this was something that he could not just forget.

 Maruki was not going to let this go as easily as Aiya was. He threw his hand down on his bed sternly, he was serious about what he was about to say.

“Ai, you are going to pack a bag, and you are going to come and stay at my house until your mother smartens up, okay Ai?” Maruki was not going to pretend like nothing happened anymore, not like he did the last time something happened to Aiya when he came to school with bruises. Maruki knew that a parent should never act in such a way to a child.

Aiya was silent for a few moments it worried Maruki slightly. Until, small rustling could be heard, it sounded suspicious to Maruki. He listened carefully to what was going on. He couldn’t quite figure it out.

“Ai, what are you doing?” With worry, Maruki propped himself, sitting as stiff as a board.

Aiya stopped what he was doing, only to questionably tilt his head towards the phone against his ear.

“What you told me to do Maruki! Pack!” Maruki was very intelligent, but he sure had his stupid moments sometimes. It didn’t matter what it was, over time Aiya would always do what Maruki told him to do. Maruki’s decision was usually the right one after all.

Aiya continued packing, clean clothes, toiletries, school uniform, everything that could last him up to a week away from home. Aiya remained on the phone with Maruki the whole time. Talking or not, Aiya felt safer with Maruki on the line with him. Having changed from his pajamas, into something street worthy, Aiya was finally ready to leave his house.

“Maru, I’m leaving now.” Aiya seemed scared to hang up, but it was necessary if he wanted to leave. Maruki gave a sound of agreement, allowing Aiya to hang up.

Placing the phone back on the receiver before silently rushing to the door to get his shoes on, Aiya knew he would regret doing this, but it was for the better. Being careful of his arm, Aiya opened the door and snuck out without any notice. He ran as quickly as he could to Maruki’s house, who still many years later lived only a few blocks away.

Maruki had not fully gotten dressed, he planned on going right back to bed as soon as Aiya was settled. A knock on the door moments later startled Maruki’s mother, who answered it soon after. Maruki soon came downstairs knowing who it was. Maruki’s mother was quite surprised to see Aiya, though it was not yet twenty-two hours yet, it was still late nonetheless.
“Kaa-chan, Aiya is having troubles. I said he can stay here until things are sorted out.” Looking at Aiya, Maruki silently told him to cover parts of his face with his hair. Inside, with clenching teeth, Maruki was angry to see those marks on Aiya’s face.

“Tch…  Is that all right Kaa-chan?” With a distinct sound of anger in his voice, Maruki pleaded to his mother.

Maruki’s mother, who was previously in the den planning for her job, was still a little shaken. Stepping aside, she allowed Aiya in the house. She agreed only because she loved Aiya like he was her own son, she knew that Maruki and Aiya were close. Maruki pulled Aiya up to his room after he removed his shoes.

Maruki snatched Aiya’s bag from his rather forcefully. He was silent for a bit, getting everything ready for Aiya to sleep. Pulling out his spare futon, resetting his alarm clock, to get up for school the next day, remaking his own bed. The whole time Aiya stood silently by the door, trying not to move. Maruki stopped once he was finished, staring silently down at the futon for a moment, letting out a small sigh.

 Maruki spun on his heels, facing Aiya. He grabbed Aiya’s hand, one that didn’t look hurt and pulled him to onto his own bed. Maruki sat next to him, facing him sternly. He quickly raised a hand to Aiya’s face, only to gently brush his bangs to the side so he could see the bruises. Aiya was shocked for a moment, his eyes closing tight until he realized what Maruki was doing.

The small yet dark bruises and tiny scratches were not things a mother should give a child. Maruki’s stern eyes softened.

“Why would you let your mother harm your pretty face like that Ai?” To Maruki it was a stupid question, but upon seeing the bruises again, he didn’t know what else to ask. With gentle grace, Maruki cupped his hand over Aiya’s cheek gently. He knew that Aiya loved his mother, and she loved him. It was all the lingering pain of the loss of his father.

Aiya looked away from Maruki. It wasn’t like he allowed his mother to hit him. She was drinking again, excessively and she lost control again, this time she was yelling at him about his father. Though Aiya never met his father, it seemed to be the reason to his mother’s excessive drinking. Looking at photos of his father before he died, Aiya realized he looked much like his father did.

Maruki gentle placed a hand on Aiya’s right shoulder, the small irregular shaped bruise on it trailed down to his elbow where there was another deeper bruise.

“Does it still hurt?” Maruki asked, cradling his bent elbow in his palm, moving it as little as possible. With soft, lidded eyes, Aiya stared at Maruki’s hand on his flesh, shaking his head, slightly, but noticeably. “We’ll check it again later, ne?” Maruki was concerned for him, but having dealt with it before, he knew he could handle it again.

After letting go, Maruki moved away slightly from Aiya, getting comfortable on his bed. Aiya’s rosebud lips parted slightly, wanting to feel Maruki’s touch more.

“I forgive my mother Maruki. It wasn't her fault.” Aiya whimpered softly, hoping his friend wouldn't be mad at him for forgiving his mother for an incident like this again.

Maruki saw the pain in Aiya’s eyes, he was angry, not at Ai, but angry altogether. He collapsed back on his bed, resting his hands on his bare stomach.

“Let’s deal with this tomorrow okay Ai?” Maruki tilted his head to the side, looking up at Aiya softly. Maruki was still tired from his nap, and he knew that Aiya needed to sleep off this night.

“Get into bed Ai.” Maruki demanded to his friend, throwing his legs up, sitting up once again. He was harsh in saying it, but Aiya knew he only meant good.

Aiya looked up at Maruki again, nodding in agreement. He was hurt, emotionally and physically, he didn’t want to do much more then sleep at the moment. Though he didn’t want to go to school the next morning either, he knew he had to. Aiya stood at the same time Maruki did, gripping the hem of his shirt with just one hand, and lifted it over his head, turning it inside out. Maruki moved to the doorway, where the light switch was located. He turned out the lights, seeing nothing but black for a few moments. Once his eyes adjusted to the black of the night, he saw Aiya’s silhouette moving to the floor where his futon was located.

Maruki found his way back to his bed easily. He crawled back onto by the foot of it by the bed. He didn’t want to step on Aiya at all. Curling under his down blanket again, Maruki lay flat on his back.

“Good night Aiya.” A small whisper, riddled with sadness and worry came down from the bed.

Aiya looked up at the bed, sliding himself under his blanket, laying his head flat on the pillow. A small smile pulled into the corner of his pink bruised lips.

“Good night Maruki. And thank you.” Even if it considered running away, even though it was down the block, Aiya was happy it was at Maruki’s. It took Aiya forever to fall asleep. Over time, he could hear Maruki breathing deeply, he could tell that he was asleep. The worry of his mother showing up at Maruki’s house filled his mind, keeping him from relaxing.  

Well past midnight now, Aiya was finally getting sleepy. The house was quiet now, Maruki’s parents having gone to bed finally. Exhaustion not relaxation was setting in. Aiya looked up at the clock, it was past two in the morning. Aiya had rolled onto his stomach, and planted his face into the pillow, letting out a sigh, he closed his eyes ready to fall asleep. Moments later, with what seemed like hours, he felt a hand touch his shoulder. Aiya jolted slightly and rolled to his side, seeing a sleepy Maruki peer down from his bed. Though it was dark, Aiya could see that Maruki was reaching for him, finally grabbing his arm, tugging slightly. Aiya was frozen a moment before he followed Maruki’s slight tugging. Maruki pulled Aiya onto his bed and under his blanket.

Aiya wasn’t all that sure if Maruki was aware of his actions until he spoke.

“You cant sleep can you Aiya?” Maruki was on his back until he felt Aiya moving in close to him. With his arm under Aiya’s head, Maruki rolled to cradle Aiya.

“Go to sleep Aiya.” Maruki whispered softly. His sleepy voice was defined as awake, but just barely. Aiya curled up in Maruki’s bare chest, soft whimpers muffling against his flesh. The warm sensation of tears rolling down his collarbone woke Maruki up more.
“Don’t cry, Aiya. Please.”  Wrapping an arm around Aiya, Maruki stroked his hair gently, trying to calm him down. 

Aiya was a big baby when it came to opening up to Maruki, this was not the first time he had cried in his arms. Maruki pulled Aiya close, cradling him, hoping he would fall asleep soon.

Not even five minutes later, Aiya was fast asleep. Maruki, was almost asleep again, his eyes getting heavy. Times like this in the past proved that he knew how to make Aiya fall asleep.